True or False: Perfect Pilot for Bachelor?

Breaking News! Lincee from I Hate Green Beans is reporting that Jake the pilot and wearer of pleated khaki pants is on tap to be the next Bachelor. This lead me to perform a little google search of my own and this article popped up which says that the next Bachelor will be announced on Dancing With The Stars on October 13th. The article also claims that Kiptyn and Reid are other possible candidates although you'll have to trust me that I have it on good authority it will sadly not be Reid.

More evidence that Jake is the next Bachelor is found in this article on US Weekly. Apparently a woman from Tennessee who is - get this - a learjet pilot (I wonder why she got picked?) states that Jake is the next Bachelor and she is one of the bachelorettes who will be competing for/"dating" Jake. She goes on to say that she probably won't find true love with Jake because they'd never see each other. I would add that she probably won't find true love with Jake because it's only happened once in nineteen tries on the dynasty that is The Bachelor/ette. ABC is not confirming anything so again, it's not a concrete.

If it is not a rumor that Jake is the pick then it leaves me with mixed feelings. Jake is so over-the-top cheese that sometimes his actions and words make me want to throw up a little in my mouth which will make for quite the nauseating season. However if I can learn to stomach the cheese then Jake as The Bachelor could lead to quality entertainment in the "I'm laughing at you, not with you" category (i.e. The Hills category, I know it sounds cruel but really it's all in fun). Plus I'm already thinking of all sorts of contests to play at viewing parties...Guess how many girls Jake will pull the lurch kiss on in the middle of her sentence? How many times will Jake use exaggerated or dated adjectives such as 'amazing', 'fantastic', and 'neat'? How many times will we hear Jake tell us he is perfect and in an ironic twist his perfection is also his one and only flaw in this world full of imperfect people? How many times will Jake lean over a balcony rail crying a la 'Mesnick'?


And finally, guess how many times Jake will make this half-smile "I'm conflicted" face?:

I would say that these topics could also be used for a drinking game (i.e. drink when Jake wears pleated khakis), but I'm afraid that would lead us to be intoxicated within the first 30 minutes of every show...and I don't host those kinds of parties. So the countdown is on friends, 6 days until the Bachelor is revealed and approximately 2.5 months until we get to view his quest for true love and all the wonderfully awkward moments that come with it.

*Note to readers, I am taking a break from blogging about the Sooners and therefore will not speak about our latest loss because it seems like every time I do we lose the following Sunday. Not saying I'm superstitious; just a little stitious. And let it be known I still love my team and the stache...and I will name my first child Sam Bradford.